Today I Became A Realist
by maraudings
Summary: When you were little, your mom told you that you would never amount to anything. That you were never that one in a million, and there was no way you could be. - a brooke centric oneshot, with some brucas undertones. RATED K


**title: **today i became a realist  
**author: **al-tothe-ex  
**rating: **k+  
**word count: **961  
**disclaimer: **belongs to mark schwahn and the cw, not me. title from a song by wax on radio.  
**a/n: **first one tree hill fic, but i've been a fan for years, so i wanted to write a small piece on my favorite character, b davis. they're some brucas bits in this too, because even though i prefer her with julian and him with peyton, i can't deny that they did have something. anyway, i hope you enjoy.

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_-today i became a realist-_

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"_Brooke Davis is going to change the world someday, and she doesn't even know it yet."_

When you were little, your mom told you that you would never amount to anything. That you were never that one in a million, and there was no way you could ever be. Your childhood (if those years could be defined as such) consisted of lonely nights in your bedroom with the many Barbie dolls that were shoved your way as a payoff for the absence of your parents. Sometimes you couldn't even believe that little girl imagining a better reality behind the red door was in fact Brooke Davis.

But you eventually did it. You proved her wrong. You took the clothing line you came up with as a distraction from your heartache and transformed it into a multimillion-dollar company. You did what most qualified businessmen and women couldn't, even with their college degrees. You had succeeded.

Though, it didn't really feel like it sometimes. Peyton, your best friend since you were nine-years-old, had her own job and her own dreams, and your phone hadn't played her designated ringtone in months. It was likewise for Nathan and Haley, the young family with their own dreams that have taken them so far in such a short time. You were happy for them all, you really were. But deep down you were envious of their personal happiness; of their families and relationships. Somehow, you just couldn't have it all.

One night, your business took you to New York City. Victoria (somehow the title 'mommy dearest' just didn't quite fit with her) informed you of a proposition to take it all to the next level. This deal included makeup, a couture line, and even your own magazine, for crying out loud. Though somehow, you hesitated when she asked you.

But then you got a call from one Lucas Scott. The very same Lucas Scott who caused the heartache that prompted the start of Clothes Over Bros and the very same one who nearly destroyed your friendship with Peyton. He was in the city, wanting to catch up after all these years.

It took a lot of considering and reconsidering to finally show up. You were supposed to be over that, over him. You were supposed to have put those feelings aside. But seeing him, standing there with his hands in his pockets, you had to try so hard not to turn and run.

You must have gathered enough self-control and enough courage to approach him, because the next thing you knew you two were talking like the old friends you said you were. He told you about his book being picked up, the very one where he spoke so highly about you and all of your other friends. You told him about your success in your career, and about your (possible) expansion plans. And he even told you about his proposal to Peyton. And her rejection.

Which honestly surprised you. Peyton and Lucas were meant to be over anything and anyone; you learned that the hard way.

But the most surprising occurrence of the evening was when something as innocent as inspecting the ring turned into a convinced member of the wait staff bringing out a bottle of champagne on the house. And you turn to him with a shrug and a smile. Because hell- it was on the house.

It seemed everywhere you went with him that night adorning that ring, free drinks and services were quick to follow. It even scored you two a free horse-drawn carriage ride. You had your own pretend life with him. Novelist, head of a fashion line, two boys and a girl, little league coach complete with a beach house...

It was all there, even if it was pretend.

Then the carriage driver said something, something that you'd never soon forget. Success was wonderful, but love is what it's all about. And sitting next to that boy, that very same boy who caused you heartache and nearly tore apart a decade long friendship, that gap in your heart suddenly became more vast. But that hole had to be shoved aside again, because you figured as it's been there practically your whole life it could last a few more hours.

Just a few more.

You spent the rest of that night getting drunk with an old friend, though he might have taken it a little farther than you did. It ended up being you who acted like his anchor, keeping him upright as you walked him to his hotel and escorted him to his room.

And then, as you took on the maternal role of tending to him with the ring still on your finger, he kisses you. And you let him. Because this was Lucas, and even though it's been years and you're supposed to be over him and he just proposed to Peyton-

Wait. You push him away, belatedly ignoring every screaming molecule in your body not to, and you tell him some gull about how him and Peyton are meant to be. How him and Peyton would get back together. But the last thing you say to Lucas Scott, before planting a lingering kiss on his forehead, closing the ring into his palm and turning your back, was more or less the only thing out of your mouth you could truly stand by.

"Lucas Scott is going to change the world someday, and he doesn't even know it yet."


End file.
